Distractions

I embarked on this Holidailies project as a way to get into a discipline of writing, because I was NOT in one. Not a regular writing appointment, daily, with a journal. I thought it would be good to have/establish one.

But I find that there is a larger problem afoot. Not only do I have too many distractions and things that take me out of writing (such as crafts, constant housework, new games on the goggle box, movies, etc.), but I'm also finding that my depression is waxing and waning, mostly waxing.

The most alarming "symptom" at this point is that the usual voices in my head (hush - not the crazy ones, but the fiction ones - the characters in my stories) HAVE STOPPED TALKING. It's lonely and cold without them. It's been a few weeks since I stopped to write something down, or even thought "I need to write that down."

Have I lost the Muse? Have I lost my will to write? This is far more alarming that missing a week or more in a project that I voluntarily took on.

The remedy that I know of for this problem is to quiet my mind. Christmas Day was lovely (the Eve as well) because a sudden snowstorm shut everything down early. I went out for walks in it. A pretty but blowy and dangerous storm, actually. For this area. But it hushed everything. It stilled my mind just long enough for me to realize that the internal dialogue had stopped.

To quiet my mind, I have decided to rid myself of projects and only tackle those that a) earn my living and b) make life conducive to the creative side. There are stories to tell. I feel that I will not survive if I don't tell them. Time for writing, yoga, fewer screens, more ink, more walks with my dog. Distractions are necessary or life will not be balanced, but from now on, I'm choosing to pursue as many distractions as I can that nurture the creative me.